Today has been a mixed bag.
I had a lie in this morning. Caught up with some reading and things, and still got up before everyone else in the flat. I feel weird waking up so late, I don’t wake up early at home but I never sleep in this often or this late!
For breakfast this morning I decided I was sick of raisins so I puréed a can of strawberries to add to my weetabix mush. Apparently, tinned strawberries taste way more like strawberry jam than fresh strawberries which was a little disappointing but never mind!
We had a nice morning, our hall organised an event with a few fun things like bouncy castles, a rodeo bull and sumo wrestling.
Unfortunately, I’ve been feeling a bit under the weather today.
I’ve had a sore throat since yesterday. One of those horrible lump-in-the-throat-when-you-swallow sort. It’s a pain but I’d rather that than a cold! Unfortunately, today I also developed a head ache, and no matter what pain killers I consume it just won’t budge. It’s not agonising but it’s making it really difficult to be sociable.
Which brings me to the next thing I’m struggling with.
Don’t get me wrong, I love it here. The campus is beautiful, my bedroom is lovely, my course sounds amazing – I can’t wait to start.
But on the people side, I’ve been having some trouble.
I’m not a big drinker. I’m not a big clubber. I’m not a big socialite.
I don’t do mess or loud noise.
I know that probably makes me sound like the strangest (and possibly most
boring tame) 18-year-old at university but it’s true.
I guess for various reasons I’ve had to grow up pretty quickly. I never really got the chance to be a normal teenager. I’ve never experienced the whole going-out thing. I can’t really manage any of that sort of thing because of my condition (part 2 coming soon by the way!) and this makes it difficult for me to connect to a lot of the people here.
I have met some lovely people and as I’ve said before, my flatmates are really nice, I just don’t have much in common with them and I have to admit, I feel a bit isolated and excluded because of my condition.
The girl I mentioned yesterday is definitely the person I’ve become closest to so far. I met her when I came up early for the disability assistance program (she has ME) and we have a lot in common. I’m really glad I met her 🙂
There is also a lovely girl in the flat next door, crazy talented at the flute, and a really sweet girl on my course who is really supportive and helpful about my condition. However, other than them everyone else I’ve met is pretty in to partying and drinking the night away.
I guess I’m just a bit homesick.
When I’m struggling physically like this and I haven’t got the wonderful support of my parents, my sister, my friends and Tom I find it a bit difficult. They help me work through the pain and I’m finding it hard to cope without them.
I know things will get easier and I’ll get to meet students on my course and in the societies I’ve joined with whom I will have more in common but it is a little difficult.
I miss my family and I miss Tom. I even miss my cat!
It’s just a bit of a down moment.
I can get through this.
I can do this!
Thank you so much for all of your lovely supportive comments, they’ve been really helping and comforting 🙂
Love you all ❤