A Lunch and a Reflection.

Hello my loves,

I hope you’re all having a great week so far!

Today is my day off. Every other week I have nothing on a Tuesday and it’s really blissful. Just the thought that I only have to get through another three days and then I can rest properly again gives me the strength to get through the week.

First, today’s positive happenings.

Look at my brand-new, shiny toy:

It’s not really a toy at all. It’s the most amazing chair I’ve ever sat in. It actually moves with you. If I lean forwards it comes with me, if I fancy leaning back a bit then I can just lean away. It has a little pump to fill part of the back-rest with air to support my lower back. Everything is adjustable. It’s wonderful.

Plus the colour is pretty cheering.

I didn’t realise it was going to be quite this bright but I kinda’ love it.

I really hope that it will help writing essays and researching online a bit easier.

Also lovely today was meeting with Natalie and Dan for lunch. These two are the cutest couple I know (after Tom and moi of course).

It was really nice to see the two of them again, it’s always nice to feel free to talk. Although I have some really fantastic friends here, I still feel more relaxed when I’m talking to people from home. People who know me outside of uni, away from the context of my condition, who know what I’m really like.

I bought a pot of pasta and tomato sauce from the canteen and, because I felt like I needed a treat, a skinny vanilla iced latte and a slice of banana bread. Indulgent yes, but delicious also. And we all need a bit of banana bread in our lives sometimes :-)

So this was all pleasant and relaxing.

Then came a chore I have a love/hate relationship with. Food shopping.

If I were a normal person I would absolutely love food shopping. I would love walking up and down the aisles of the supermarket, examining all of the different foods. I would love going into the local farm shop and having a chat with the fishmonger, picking out fresh herbs, buying locally made chutneys. I would love visiting the organic supermarket and gazing longingly at all of the wondrous health foods.

But. I had to take my cane because my knees have been playing up so I can’t push a trolley. Carrying a basket hurts. Bending down and reaching up hurts. Carrying the food in a bag on my shoulder hurts.

Luckily my lovely (I definitely overuse that word) friend Kathryn came with me so she helped where she could. But I can’t ask her to reach everything for me and she has her own food to carry.

Being disabled with any sort of outward visual sign exposes your fellow human beings. It separates the polite, the thoughtful, the caring, and the selfless, from the selfish, self-centred, and ignorant. You can tell a lot about people from the way they interact with the disabled or the elderly.

Honestly, sometimes after a hard trip out like this afternoon’s, part of me wants to give up on people. Especially when they walk towards you, chatting with their friend and neither makes any effort to move. Especially when people actually physically push past you. It really makes you feel like everyone is in their own bubble, self-centred, they’ll only help if it suits them or if it’s in their own interest. I have to work really hard to remember that not all people are like that. Many people are kindhearted. Many people do care. Many people do help.

And then, just one polite and thoughtful person will show you why it’s important to keep faith in people. A lovely, friendly looking man stopped, stood back and let me pass. Even though there probably would have been room for both of us. That’s all it takes.

I hope I was one of these people five years ago.

How do you feel about these sorts of issues?
What makes you lose faith in people?

When was the last time you treated yourself? Go on, you deserve it!

28 comments

  1. It is really sad how down right rude and selfish people can be and I try really hard not to be one of those people. I always try to take in consideration on how the other person might be viewing it because they don’t know you, and you don’t know them. But doing the right thing is unjustifiable. Anyways, I’m glad you had a good day! I love comfy chairs and yours really brightens up the room! :)

  2. That chair is awesome!!! Love the color ;)
    “You can tell a lot about people from the way they interact with the disabled or the elderly.” You are sooooo right. I wish more people in the world were like that man who stepped aside.
    PS– has anyone ever told you you look like Kate Winslet as Rose in titanic?? I just saw the ad for the movie on tv and was like WHOA!!! Both of you are so gorgeous!! :)

    1. Thank you! I was pretty pleased with it when it came :-)

      Oh thank you so much!! That’s the nicest compliment anyone has made me in ages! I love Kate Winslet as an actress and her hair is gorgeous in that film! You’re such a lovely girl Alexandra :-)

  3. The chair’s looking great and so comfy! You’re so right about the way people interact. The one thing I cannot stand is when others are rude and inconsiderate. It just bothers the heck out of me! I’m glad you had a nice day off! :]

  4. You tease me with delicious looking food all throughout this blog. I swear all they feed me at my English uni are potatoes and mushy fish patties. At least, that’s all I can identify. And of course I’m to cheap to actually buy real food, so I settle.

    On a more related note, I’ll admit that I lose faith in people oh so easily for the littlest things, like when people litter or are rude to waiters. And yet, at the same time, my faith can be easily restored as well by a kind word or a generous act. It’s an endless tug of war in my head.

    1. Oops my bad, I’m sorry :-P Oh that doesn’t sound like much good! I don’t like potatoes much, let alone mushy fish patties… Haha that made me laugh, I would struggle with paying if I was already having food provided for me!

      I hate it when people are rude to waiters, oh and to any kind of retail staff, the amount of times I’ve seen people treat people in those jobs as though they weren’t real humans is ridiculous, just makes me angry! I’m exactly the same don’t worry, I try to let my faith be restored more than the other way around :-)

  5. I really don’t get why people aren’t always nice. Being polite keeps everyone happy, and it’s much nicer to make someone smile than to make them frown. Also, your halls look so nice and shiny :( mine were nothing like that! I hope you’re feeling better soon Sophie x

    1. That is exactly what I don’t get either, it makes so much more sense seeing as I’m fairly sure that everyone wants to be treated nicely. Yes I realise I’m quite lucky! Thank you lovely :-)

  6. Oh my – I want that chair … it’s so pink!!!!
    It doesn’t take much to be polite and caring, so I don’t understand why people are so rude. Maybe they don’t care, they’re embarrassed or they don’t notice – whatever it is there isn’t really an excuse.

  7. First of all, I love your new chair!! Such a great colour! Secondly – we all definitely need banana bread in our lives at times :-) And most importantly, I love the second half of this post. I love how you describe that disability reveals people for who they really are….I love that kind gentleman for being nice to you :) x x x

  8. LOVE that chair. Unfortunately, it just wouldn’t go with our kitchen (where the computer desk is) nor would the office staff appreciate it. ;)
    I’ll that the Starbucks coffee! YUM!

    People do disappoint but for all those that are rude and inconsiderate, there are the ones that go out of their way to be helpful and kind.
    As for treating myself – just did a week of that during our California trip.

    1. Oh that’s a shame :-P

      That’s very true, it’s what I always remind myself of when I have any bad experiences with a person!

      So I saw, it looked amazing and I’m glad you had a great time :-)

  9. First off, love your new chair! I’d like a bright green one :)

    It’s sad that people can’t be nice. I know I’m not the nicest person ever, but I’m always willing to help people. I like to think the people that are considerate and kind make up for the people who are stuck in their own self-centered bubble.

  10. What a FABULOUS chair! And ugh, people. I do have to admit I sometimes hesitate to help or even offer to help someone with disabilities, because I’m not sure if my help would get in the way or the person wants to do the thing for themselves, even if it takes a little longer or is a little harder. I guess it wouldn’t be a bad thing to make it a rule to always ask, though, would it? But I would never be rude, ignore or get in the way of someone! How do you feel about offers of help, or if people “help” without asking first?

    And I bought myself a ludicrously expensive drink yesterday. $3.65 for this amazing ginger-lemonade. Totally worth the treat!

    1. I can completely understand that and the only time I would ever really expect someone to offer help would be if there are no seats free on a bus or when I have to put my luggage in the rack on the train! Personally I would never be offended in any way if someone offered help, I would think it was very kind :-) Can’t speak for all handicapped people though.

      Ooh that sounds lovely!

  11. I know everybody is busy with their own lives, but it just makes me so sad to see people not care at all about anyone else! I think if people would just be less self-centered, the world would be so much better.

    Your chair looks so comfy and I love the color! It would totally brighten my day!

  12. That chair is awesome- the colour is great, love it! I hoping to make a banana bread loaf when I am off work and I cannot wait to get baking. Being courteous and caring about other people really isn’t that hard at all. It’s a shame that some people find this such a struggle.

  13. Had a complete “people ARE good” moment at work yesterday. I asked my company for donations to help my upcoming stair climb for the Amer Lung Assoc, and not only did people donate immediately, but a co-worker offered to help me plan a 50/50 raffle at lunch next Friday to support my cause. I’ve already surpassed my fundraising goal and didn’t even think I’d meet it! Totally made me so grateful for kind people like my co-workers.
    I love the pink chair, OMG I want!!! And the latte with the banana bread – Starbucks banana bread truly is fantastic and pairs so well with coffee :)

    1. Well thank you for sharing this Caitlin, it’s a lovely story to hear and it has helped to remind me that there are plenty of fantastic people out there :-) I’m really glad you met and surpassed your fundraising goal!!

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